


My Immortal:  From The Library of Jurgen Leitner

by acegalahads



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, F/M, i hate that Nikola x Tim is a tag, i'll probably update the warnings and stuff as i go because my immortal is.... yikes.., i'm so sorry for this. i really am, just know that if it happens in My Immortal it happens here, most of the character tags are just there to help me keep track
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:49:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 10,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27386710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acegalahads/pseuds/acegalahads
Summary: Leitner found in the remains of The House of Wax: a pink notebook with pictures of clowns taped to it, covered in glitter and colorful stickers, entirely handwritten, affiliated with the stranger. Believed to have been written by Nikola Orsinov, presumably a fanfiction about people she knows.
Relationships: Arthur Nolan/Nikola Orsinov, Arthur Nolan/Simon Fairchild, Diego Molina/Nikola Orsinov, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist/Gerard Keay, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist/Tim Stoker, Julia Montauk/Nikola Orsinov, Martin Blackwood/Sarah Baldwin, Michael "Mike" Crew/Nikola Orsinov, Michael | The Distortion/Melanie King, Nikola Orsinov & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Nikola Orsinov & Melanie King, Nikola Orsinov & Peter Lukas, Nikola Orsinov & Sarah Baldwin, Nikola Orsinov & Simon Fairchild, Nikola Orsinov/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Nikola Orsinov/Tim Stoker
Comments: 23
Kudos: 45





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry for this. Here's [my tumblr (updated link)](https://oh-peacemaker.tumblr.com/) if you want to yell at me for bringing this cursed story into the world. From this point on I will not be leaving notes so you're on your own.
> 
> For the first time ever, my vintage circus hyperfixation has proved useful though, so I'm sorry if one of Nikola's weird clown references confuses you. I can explain in the comments.

Chapter 1.

AN: Special trapez (get it, coz Im clonncore) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) Sarah, anglerfish666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin ur da luv of my dazzzling life u rok 2! Circkue d soley ROX!

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Hi my name is Candy Vaud’ville Prosopagnosia Sarah Grimaldi and I have short cotton-candy pink hair (that’s how I got my name) with red streaks and blue tips that reaches my shoulders and icy blue eyes like glassy tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amelia Butler (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Joseph Grimaldi but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a mannequin but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also an avatar, and I go to a magic school called Magnus in England where I’m in the seventh year (I’m seventeen). I’m a clown (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly red. I love dollskill and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a pink corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, red fishnets and blue stiletto heels. I was wearing purple lipstick, white foundation, orange eyeliner and yellow eye shadow. I was walking outside Magnus. It wasn't snowing or raining so there was the sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of hunters stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

“Hey Candy!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Tim Stoker!

“What’s up Tim?” I asked.

“Nothing.” he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

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AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me trapez!


	2. 2

Chapter 2.

AN: Trapez 2 anglerfish666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW arkival asistans stop flaming ma story ok!

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The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was sunny again. I opened the door of my tent and drank some blood from a bottle I had. My tent was purple silk and inside it had a hot pink velvet bed with yellow lace on the ends. I got out of my tent and took of my giant Cirque du Soleil t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a purple leather dress, a theatre mask necklace, stiletto heels and rainbow fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.

My friend, Sugar (AN: Sarah dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her short jaw-length raven black hair with blue streaks and opened her forest-green eyes. She put on her Barnum and Bailey t-shirt with a red mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (red lipstick white foundation and pink eyeliner.)

“OMFG, I saw you talking to Tim Stoker yesterday!” she said excitedly.

“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.

“Do you like Tim?” she asked as we went out of the Stranger common room and into the Great Hall.

“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.

“Yeah right!” she exclaimed. Just then, Tim walked up to me.

“Hi.” he said.

“Hi.” I replied flirtily.

“Guess what.” he said.

“What?” I asked.

“Well, Circus Contraption are having a performance in the corpse roots.” he told me.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love CC. They are my favorite circus, besides CdS.

“Well…. do you want to go with me?” he asked.

I gasped.


	3. 3

Chapter 3.

AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY DIZTORSHUNZ OK! odderwize trapez 2 da clonncore ppl 4 da good reveiws! TRAPEZ AGEN SARAH! oh yeah, BTW I don’t own dis or da lyrics 4 Circus Contapshun.

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On the night of the performance I put on my red lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were chevron pink tights. Then I put on a yellow leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little excited then, so I skinned one of my arms. I read an exciting book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some CC. I painted my nails gold and put on TONS of pink eyeliner. Then I put on some pink lipstick. I didn’t put on foundation because I was plastic anyway. I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert.

I went outside. Tim was waiting there in front of his car. He was wearing a Circuba t-shirt (they would perform at the show too), baggy red skater pants, blue nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).

“Hi Tim!” I said in an excited voice.

“Hi Candy.” he said back. We walked into his red clown car (the license plate said clownz) and drove to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to The Greatest Showman and Cabaret. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Circus Contraption.

“I remember the day you showed up in a suit  
Clowing around like you didn't care  
I remember the way you trashed a unicycle  
Our eyes met  
And I did a quadruple-spin-cycle-double-square-lemon-spiral-cotton-candy loop in the end.” sang the ringmaster (I don’t own da lyrics 2 dat song).

“The ringmaster is so fucking hot.” I said to Tim, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Tim looked sad.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as we swayed to the music. Then I caught on.

“Hey, it’s ok I don’t like him better than YOU!” I said.

“Really?” asked Tim sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.

“Really.” I said. “Besides I don’t even know the ringmaster and he’s going out with the fucking aerialist. I fucking hate that little bitch.” I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Tim. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked the strongman and the ringmaster for their autographs and photos with them. We got CC concert tees. Tim and I crawled back into the clown car, but Tim didn’t go back into Magnus, instead he drove the car into……………………… Gwydir Forest!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I don't know shit about Circus Contraption


	4. 4

Chapter 4.

AN: I sed stup flaming ok Candy’s name is CNADY nut mary su OK! TIM IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!

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“Tim!” I shouted. “What the fuck do you think you are doing?”

Tim didn’t answer but he stopped the car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

“What the fucking hell?” I asked angrily.

“Candy?” he asked.

“What?” I snapped.

Tim leaned in extra-close and I looked into his beholding green eyes (he wasn't wearing color contacts) which revealed so much exciting sorrow and revenge and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore.

And then…………… suddenly just as I Tim kissed me passionately. Tim climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”

It was…………………………………………………….Plukas!


	5. 5

Chapter 5.

AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a huntr or a arkival asistan! Da only reson Pluacs swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!

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Plukas made and Tim and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.

“You ludacris fools!” he shouted.

I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face. Tim comforted me. When we went back to the castle Plukas took us to Professor Farchild and Professor Wakly who were both looking very angry.

“They were having sexual intercourse in Gwydir Forest!” he yelled in a furious voice.

“Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?” asked Professor Wakely.

“How dare you?” demanded Professor Fairchild.

And then Tim shrieked. “BECAUSE I LOVE HER!”

Everyone was quiet. Plukas and Professor Wakely still looked mad but Professor Fairchild said. “Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms.”

Tim and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us.

“Are you okay, Candy?” Tim asked me gently.

“Yeah I guess.” I lied. I went to the girl’s dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a low-cut yellow floor-length dress with purple lace all around it and red high heels. When I came out….

Tim was standing in front of the bathroom, and he started to sing ‘Come to the Circus’ by Circus Contraption. I was so flattered, even though he wasn’t supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room.


	6. 6

Chapter 6.

AN: shjt up hunetz ok! PS I wnot update ubtil u give me goood revows!

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The next day I woke up in my tent. I put on a pink miniskirt that was all frilly around the end and a matching top with blue stars all over it and high heeled boots that were yellow. I put on two pairs of rainbow earrings, and two hearts in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple.

In the Great Hall, I ate some Frankenberry cereal with blood instead of milk, and a glass of red blood. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the blood spilled over my top.

“Bastard!” I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the golden brown face of a clowncore boy with long black hair with grey streaks in it. He was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down his face and he was wearing black lipstick. He didn’t have glasses anymore and now he had beholding green eyes just like Tim and there was no scar on his nec anymore. He had no manly stubble on his chin. He had a sexy English accent. He looked exactly like Sushila Sundari. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I’m a girl so I didn’t get one you sicko.

“I’m so sorry.” he said in a shy voice.

“That’s all right. What’s your name?” I questioned.

“My name’s Jonathan Sims, although most people call me Archivist these days.” he grumbled.

“Why?” I exclaimed.

“Because I love the taste of statements.” he giggled.

“Well, I am a mannequin.” I confessed.

“Really?” he whimpered.

“Yeah.” I roared.

We sat down to talk for a while. Then Tim came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him.


	7. 7

Chapter 7. Bring me 2 life

AN: wel ok u guyz im only writting dis cuz I got 5 god reviuws. n BTW I wont rite da nxt chapter til I git TIN god vons! STO FLAMING OR ILL REPORT U! Caydy isn’t a Marie Sue ok she isn’t perfect SHES A COMMUIST! n she has problemz shes depressed 4 godz sake!

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Tim and I held our plastic hands with blue nail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing red clonn sings on my nails in red nail polish (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Archivist. Dark misery was in his ceaseless watcher eyes. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Tim. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Tim. We went into his room and locked the door. Then…………

We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. He felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my ppink leather bra and he took off his pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then he put his boy’s thingy in mine and we HAD SEX. (c is dat stupid?)

“Oh Tim, Tim!” I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Tim’s arm. It was a yellow heart with an arrow through it. On it in bubbly writing were the words………… Archivist!

I was so angry.

“You bastard!” I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.

“No! No! But you don’t understand!” Tim pleaded. But I knew too much.

“No, you fucking idiot!” I shouted. “You probably have AIDs anyway!”

I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Tim ran out even though he was naked. He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Archivist’s classroom where he was having a lesson with Professor Fairchild and some other people.

“ARCHIVIST SIMS, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” I yelled.


	8. 8

Chapter 8.

AN: stop flassing ok! if u do den u r a prep!

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Everyone in the class stared at me and then Tim came into the room even though he was naked and started begging me to take him back.

“Candy, it’s not what you think!” Tim screamed sadly.

My friend B'ubbles Slaughter Queen smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her long waste-length black hair and opened her crimson eyes like blood that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had medium tan skin that she was wearing blue makeup on. Melanie was kidnapped when she was born. Her real parents are desolation and one of them is a clown but Elias killed her mother and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Queen and not King. (Since she has converted to communism she is slaughter now not beholdiing. )

“What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!” Fairchid demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him.

“Archivist, I can’t believe you cheated on me with Tim!” I shouted at him.

Everyone gasped.

I don’t know why Candy was so mad at me. I had went out with Archivist (I’m bi and so is Candy) for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Gerard, a stupid goth fucker. We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was clowncore. (Haha, like I would hang out with a goth.)

“But I’m not going out with Tim anymore!” said Archivist.

“Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!” I screamed. I ran out of the room and into Gwydir Forest where I had lost my virility to Tim and then I started to bust into tears.


	9. 9

Chapter 9.

AN: stop flaming ok! I dntn lisen 2 al da tapz! dis is frum da gozip ok so itz nut my folt if plucas swers! besuizds I SED HE HAD A HEDACHE! and da reson farcil dosent lik john now is coz hes capitist and archivist is a commuist! CdS ROX!

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I was so mad and sad. I couldn’t believe Tim for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Tim.

Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with green eyes and no nose and everything started running towards me! He didn’t have a nose (basically like Elias in Jude Perry's photoshop) and he was wearing all green but it was obvious he wasn’t clowncore. It was…… Elias!

“No!” I shouted in a scared voice but then Elias shouted “Ceaseless watcher!” and I couldn’t run away.

“I do not know you!” I shouted at him. Elias fell and started to scream. I felt bad for him even though I’m a manequin so I stopped.

“Candy.” he yelled. “Thou must kill Archivist Sims!”

I thought about Archivist and his sexah eyes and his long black hair and how his face looks just like Sushila Sundari. I remembered that Tim had said I didn’t understand, so I thought, what if Tim went out with Archivist before I went out with him and they broke up?

“No, Elias!” I shouted back.

Elias gave me a gun. “No! Please!” I begged.

“Thou must!” he yelled. “If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Tim!”

“How did you know?” I asked in a surprised way.

Elias got a dude-ur-so-oblivious look on his face. “I hath telekinesis.” he answered cruelly. “And if you doth not kill Archivist, then thou know what will happen to Tim!” he shouted. Then he flew away angrily.

I was so scared and mad I didn’t know what to do. Suddenly Tim came into the woods.

“Tim!” I said. “Hi!”

“Hi.” he said back but his face was all sad. He was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a ring (geddit) between a ringmaster and a lion tamer.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“No.” he answered.

“I’m sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me.” I expelled.

“That’s okay.” he said all depressed and we went back into Magnus together making out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright i was planning not to change the original's word choice unless it was absolutely necessary but this chapter said the r word so yeah no that plan's out the fucking window


	10. 10

Chapter 10.

AN: stup it u gay lihtlezz flamz if u donot lik ma story den fukk off! ps it turnz out b’ubbles slaughter isn’t a wachr afert al n she n archivist r clonnz datz y dey movd entitez ok!

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I was really scared about Eilas all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals with my circus The Circus of the Other. I am the ringmaster. People say that we sound like a cross between CdS, CC and a bad LSD trip. The other people in the band are B’ubbles Slaughter, Archivist, Tim, Martin (although we call him Pancake now. He has white hair now with red streaks in it.) and Evan Lucas. Only today Tim and Archivist were beholding so they weren’t coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Tim was probably blowing himself up (he wouldn’t die because he was a avatar too and the only way you can kill a avatar is with a h-u-n-t-e-r (there’s no way I’m writing that) or a lack off fear) and Archivist was probably reading a depressing statement like Lost Johns' Cave. I put on a red leather shirt that showed off my plastic boobs and tiny matching miniskirt that said Chic Fil A Wants Me Dead on the butt. You might think I’m a slut but I’m really not.

We were singing a cover of ‘The Dismemberment Song’ and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears.

“Candy! Are you OK?” B’ubbles Slaughter asked in a concerted voice.

“What the fuck do you think?” I asked angrily. And then I said. “Well, Elias came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Jon! But I don’t want to kill him, because, he’s really nice, even if he did go out with Tim. But if I don’t kill Jon, then Elias, will fucking kill Tim!” I burst into tears.  
Suddenly Tim jumped out from behind a wall.

“Why didn’t you fucking tell me!” he shouted. “How could you- you- you fucking poser stranger bitch!” (c is dat out of character?)

I started to cry and cry. Tim started to cry too all sensitive. Then he ran out crying.

We practiced for one more hour. Then suddenly Plukas walked in angrily! His eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn’t cause he had a headache.

“What have you done!” He started to cry wisely. (c dats basically nut swering and dis time he wuz relly upset n u wil c y) “Candy Tim has been found in his room. He committed suicide by using the detonator.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one also had a slur in the original, fucking yikes Tara


	11. 11

Chapter 11.

AN: i sed stup flaming up arkival asistanz! c if dis chaptr is srupid!1111 it delz wit rly sris issus! sp c 4 urself if itz ztupid brw trapez 2 ma frend raven 4 hleping me!

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“NO!” I screamed. I was horrorfied! B’ubbles Slaughter tried to comfort me but I told her fuck off and I ran to my room crying myself. Plukas chased after me shouting but he had to stop when I went into my room cause he would look like a perv that way.

Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I took off my skin. Blood got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Britney Spears song at full volume. I grabbed a leitner and almost read it all to commit suicide. I was so fucking depressed! I got out of the bathtub and put on a pink low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on yellow high heels with blue metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of star earrings. I couldn’t fucking believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Fairchild was spying on me and he was taking a video tape of me! And Artur Nolan was masticating to it! They were sitting.

“EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!” I screamed putting on a red towel with a picture of a tiger on it. Suddenly Archivist ran in.

“Cessless watcher!” he yelled at Fairchild and Nolan pointing his eiyes. I took my gun and shot Fairchild and Nolan a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly, Plucas ran in. “Candy, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” he shouted looking at Fairchild and Nolan and then he waved his hand and suddenly…

EvaLucas ran outside on his broom and said everyone we need to talk.

“What do you know, Evan? You’re just a little Magnus student!”

“I MAY BE A MAGNUS STUDENT….” Eevan paused angrily. “BUT I AM ALSO A COMMUNIST!”

“This cannot be.” Fairchild said in a crisp voice as mist dripped from his hand where Plukas’s wand had shot him. “There must be other factors.”

“YOU DON’T HAVE ANY!” I yelled in madly.

Nolan held up the camera triumelephantly. “The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!”

I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not moisturize enough.

“Why are you doing this?” Nolan said angrily while he rubbed his dirty hands on his clook.

And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from him. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to skin him and wear it because I felt faint.

“BECAUSE…BECAUSE….” Evan said and he paused in the air dramitaclly, waving his hand in the air. Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a clowncore version of a song by Avril Laveen.

“Because you’re clonncore?” Fairchild asked in a little afraid voice cause he was afraind it meant he was connected with the buried.

“Because I LOVE HER!”


	12. 12

Chapter 12.

AN: stop f,aing ok Enan is a pedo 2 a lot of ppl in amerikan skoolz r lik dat I wunted 2 adres da ishu! how du u no farchil iant kristian plus evvan isn’t really in luv wif candy dat was mik crew ok!

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I was about to take off my skin again with the silver knife that Tim had given me in case anything happened to him. He had told me to use it valiantly against an enemy but I knew that we must both go together.

“NO!” I THOUGHT IT WAS EVVan but it was Archivist. He started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!” and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his green whites.

I stopped. “How did u know?”

“I saw it! And my worm scars started to move!”

“NO!” I ran up closer. “I thought you didn’t have a scar anymore!” I shouted.

“I do but Pancake changed it into a clown for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” he said back. “Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the knife mark! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Tim…………….Elia has him bondage!”

Anyway I was in the school nurse’s office now recovering from my slit wrists. Farchild and Nolaan and EAAn were there too. They were going to Wonderland Hose after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can’t have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz. Plukas had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them.

Anyway Ean came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of black roses.

“Cnady I need to tell u somethnig.” he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.

“Fuck off.” I told him. “You know I fucking hate the color black anyway, and I don’t like fucked up preps like you.” I snapped. Ean had been mean to me before for being clonnocre.

“No Cnady.” Ean says. “Those are not roses.”

“What, are they strangers too you poser vastard?” I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me black roses.

“I saved your life!” He yelled angrily. “No you didn’t I replied.” “You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Farchild and Nolaan.” Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) to it he added silently.

“Whatever!” I yelled angirly.

He pointed his wand at the black roses. “These aren’t roses.” He suddenly looked at them with an evil look in his eye and muttered All eyes on Me in the center of the rING JUST LIKE A CIRCUS! .

“That’s not an ncantation that’s an Britney song.” I corrected him wisely.

“I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes.” Then he screamed. “Y'AI 'NG'NGAH, YOG-SOTHOTH H'EE-L'GEB F'AI THRODOG UAAAH  
OGTHROD AI'F GEB'L-EE'H YOG-SOTHOTH 'NGAH'NG AI'Y ZHRO(4 all u cool clonncore mecks fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for sarah I love you girl!)ALL THE DOORS ARE OPEN NOW!”

And then the roses turned into a huge pink spotlight floating in the middle of the air. And it was pink. Now I knew he wasn’t a vastard.

“OK I believe you now wtf is Tin?”

Ean rolled his eyes. I looked into the spotlight but I could c nothing.

“U c, Cnaddy,” Plucas said, watching the two of us watching the spotlight. “2 c wht iz n da sptlit(HAHA U REVIEWRS SPTLIGT GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?”

“I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!” Ean yelled. pLUKas lookd shockd. I guess he didn’t have a headache or else he would have said something back.

Ean stormed off back into his bed. “U r a liar, prof plukckcas!”

Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a pink leather minidress that was all frilly on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on yellow fishnets and red high-heeled boots with pictures of PT Barnum on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Eurydice from Hadestown (if u don’t know who she iz ur a huntr so fuk off!) and I put on blood-red lipstick, orange eyeliner and purple lip gloss.

“You look kawai, girl.” B’ubbles Slaughter said sadly. “Trapes (geddit) you do too.” I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I skinned both of my arms feeling totally excited and I rubbed in all the blood. I laughed again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Farchild and Nolaan couldn’t spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Archivist was in the Artifect storange. He looked all depressed because Tim had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Tim. He was taking some statement from a end.

“Hi.” he said in a excited way. “Hi back.” I said in an wqually said way.

We both looked at each other for some time. Jon had beautiful green beholding eyes so much like Tims. Then……… we jumped on each other and started screwing each other.

“STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!” shouted Professor Wakle who was watching us and so was everyone else.

“Archivist you fucker!” I said slapping him. “Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Tim!” I shouted and then I ran away angrily.

Just then he started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!” and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his green whites.

“NO!” I ran up closer.

“I thought you didn’t have a scar anymore!” I shouted.

“I do but Pancake changed it into a clown for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” he said back. “Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Tim…………….Elilas has him bondage!”

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SPECIAL FANGZ 2 SARAH MY CLONNCRE BLOOD SISTA WTF UR SUPPOZD 2 RIT DIS!11111111

HEY SARAH DO U KNOW WHERE MY SWEATER I


	13. 13

Chapter 13.

AN: sarah trapez 4 gelpin me agen im sory ah tok ur postr of ptbarnum but dat guy is such a fokin sexbom! PREPZ STOP FLAMIGNG!

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Archivist and I ran up the stairs looking for Plukas. We were so scared.

“Plukas Pluccas!” we both yelled. Dumbledore came there.

“What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?” he asked angrily.

“Eliss has Tim!” we shouted at the same time.

He laughed in an evil voice.

“No! Don’t! We need to save Tim!” we begged.

“No.” he said meanly. “I don’t give a darn what Elias does to Tim. Not after how much he misbehaved in school especially with YOU Candy.” he said while he frowned looking at me. “Besides I never liked him that much anyway.” then he walked away. Archivist started crying. “My Tim!” he moaned. (AN: don’t u fik gay guyz r lik so hot!)

“Its okay!” I tried to tell him but that didn’t stop him. He started to cry tears of blood. Then he had a brainstorm. “I had an idea!” he exclaimed.

“What?” I asked him.

“You’ll see.” he said. He opened his eyes and did a incantation. Then…… suddenly we were in Eliss's lair!

We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. “Ccessless watchr!”  
It was……………………………….. Elias!


	14. 14

Chapter 14.

AN: fuk off HUNTERZ ok! Srah trapez 4 helpin agen. im sory ah kudnt update but I wuz bred n I had 2 go 2 met eliss cuz da arkvist escappd. PS im nut updating til u giv me 10 god revoiws!

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WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD.

We ran to where Elish was. It turned out that Elias wasn’t there. Instead the tall guy who killed Mike was. Tim was there crying tears of blood. Diego was torturing him. Vampire and I ran in front of Diego.

“Rid my sight you despicable preps!” he shouted as we started shooting him with the gun he Then suddenly he looked at me and he fell down with a lovey-dovey look in his eyes. “CandyIloveyouwiluhavesexwithme.” he said. (in dis he is sixteen yrs old so hes not a pedofile ok)

“Huh?” I asked.  
”Cnady I love you will you have sex with me?” asked Diego. I started laughing crudely. “What the fuck? You torture my bf and then you expect me to fuck you? God, you are so fucked up you fucking bastard.” I said angrily. Then I stabbed him in the heart. Wax pored out of it like a fountain.

“Nooooooooooooo!” he screamed. He started screaming and running around. Then he fell down and died. I brust into tears sadly.

“Diego what art thou doing?” called Elias. Then…… he started coming! We could hear his high heels clacking to us. So we got on our broomsticks and we flew to Magnus. We went to my room. Archivist went away. There I started crying.

“What’s wrong honey?” asked Tim taking off his clothes so we could screw. He had a sex-pack (geddit cuz hes so sexah) and a really huge you-know-what and everything.

“Its so unfair!” I yielded. “Why can’t I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and hunters here except for B'ubbles Slaughter, because she’s not ugly or anything.”

“Why would you wanna be ugly? I don’t like the preps anyway. They are such fucking sluts.” answered Tim.

“Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Farchild and Nolan took a video of me naked. Evan says he’s in love with me. Archivist likes me and now even Diego is in love with me! I just wanna be with you ok Tim! Why couldn’t I Do Not Know You have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily. (an” don’t wory cnayd isn’t a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) “Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!” I shouted and then I ran away.


	15. 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need a fucking spreadsheet to keep track of this shit

Chapter 15.

AN: stup flaming ok! btw u suk frum no on evry tim sum1 flams me im gona skn sm1! trapez 2 sarah 4 hlpein!

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“Candy Candy!” shouted Draco sadly. “No, please, come back!”

But I was too mad.

“Whatever! Now u can go anh have sex with Archivist!” I shouted. I stormed into my room and closed my green door with my sparkly-blue key. It had a picture of PT Barnum on it. He looked so sexy in a way that reminded me of Tim and Archivist. I started to cry and weep. I took a razor and started to skin myself. I drank the blood all depressed. Then I looked at my red CdS watch and noticed it was time to go to Anatomy class.

I put on a short sequinned blue clowncorre dress that said Applase on the front in blood red letters and was all frilly and a shiny belt. Under that I put on neon pink fishnets and boots that said fun all over them with blood red letters. I put my cottoncandy pink hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. I did sum advanced Anatomy work. I was turning a bloody spotlight into a pink mandolin. Suddenly the guitar turned to Tim!

“Cnady I love you!” he shouted sadly. “I dnot care what those fucker hunters and watchers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!.” Then……………. he started to sing “Circuw” (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Britney was singing it) right in front of the entire class! His singing voice was so amazing and gothic and sexxy like a cross between Bernadette, Britney, Avril, Kelly and PT Barnum (AN: don’t u fink dos pplz r so hot. if u dnot no who dey r get da fuk out od hr!) .

“OMFG.” I said after he was finished. Some fucking hunterz stared at us but I just stuck up my middle fingers (that were covered in pink nail polish and were entwined with Tim's now) at them. “I love you!” I said and then we started to kiss just like Lae Michelle (i fukin h8 dat bitch) and JG in a Spring Awakening. Then we went away holding hands. Nolan shouted at us but he stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how sexy we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that CdS would have a concert in the corpse roots right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some things, i add for my own personal amusement, for example: nikola's bi ass naming a bunch of women when she was looking for a hot singer to compare tim's voice to


	16. 16

Chapter 16.

AN: u no wut! sut up ok! proov 2 me ur nut huntz! sarah u suk u fuken bich gimme bak mah fukijn swteet ur supsd 2 rit dis! Sarah wtf u bich ur suposd to dodis! BTW trapez 2 judearson420 4 techin muh japnese!

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We ran happily to ta crpz roots. There we saw the stage where CC had played. We ran in happly. CdS were there playing Iris. I was so fucking happy! The acrobat looked even sexier than he did in da pictures. Even Tim thought so, I could totally see him getting an erection but it didn’t matter cuz I knew know that we were da only true ones for eachother. I was wearing a pink leather minidress and black leather platinum boots with red ripped fishnets. Draco was wearing a pink baggy Barnum and Bailey t-shirt and black pants. Anyway, we frenched. Suddenly, the acrobat pulled off his mask. So did the others. We gasped. It wasn’t them at all. It was.,……………………….. Eliass and da watcherz!

“Wtf Tim im not going to a concert wid u!” I shouted angrily. “Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its CdS n u no how much I lik them”

“What cause we…you know…” he gadgetted uncomfortbli cause guys don’t like to talk a bout you-know-what.

“Yeah cause we you know!” I yielded in an angry voice.

“We won’t do that again.” Tim promised. “This time, we’re going with an ESCORT.”

“OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?” I asked. “So I guess ur a huntr or a Christina or what now?”

“NO.” he muttered loudly.

“R u becoming a huntr or what?” I shootd angrily.

“Cnady! I’m not! Pls come with me!” He fell down to his knees and started singing ‘As The Children Laugh’ by CC to me.

I was flattened cause that’s not even a single, he had memorized da lyrks just 4 me!

“OK then I guess I will have to.” I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room.

B’ubbles Slaughter was standing there. “Hajimemashite gurl.” she said happily (she spex Japanese so do i. dat menz ‘how do u do’ in japanese). “BTW Sugar that fucking poser got expuld. she failed al her klasses and she skepped math.” (an: SARAH U FUKIN SUK! FUK U!)

“It serves that fuking bich right.” I laughed angrily.

Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some clonncore movies like Das Gr8est sho. “Maybe Sugar will die too.” I said.

“Kawai.” B’ubbles sluater shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. “Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den nolan did it with her cause he’s a necphilak.”

“Kawai.” I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie.

“OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with tim tonight in Hogsmeade with cds.” I sed. “ I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA.”

B’Ubbles Slter Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. “Omfg totally lets go shopping.”

“In Claire's, right?” I asked, already getting out my spshcial Claire's Loiyalty carde.

“No.” My head snaped up.

‘WHAT?” my head spuin. I could not believe it. “B’Ubbles Slaughter are u a GOTH?”

“NOOOO!NOOOO!” She laughed. “I found some cool clonncore stores near Hogwarts that’s all.”

“Hu told u abut them” I askd sure it would be Tim or Pancake or Archivist(don’t even SAY that nam to me!). Or me.

“Pluckas.” She sed. “Let me just call our carz.”

“OMFFG PLUCKASS?” I asked quietly.

“Yah I saw the map for the corpse roots on his desk.” She told me. “Come on let’s go.”

We were going in a few scenekiddcore stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in the corpse roots. The salesperson was OMG HOTTER THAN AVRIL EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE and he gave me a few dresses. “We only have these for da real clonns.”

“Da real clonns?” Me and B’Ubbles Slaughter asked.

“Yah u wouldn’t believe how many huntrz ther are in this town man! Yesterday nolan and farchild tried to buy a clonncore camera pouch.” He shook his head. “I dint even no they had a camera.”

“OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!” I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a big pink dress with lots of yellow tulle coming out and very low-cut with a huge hoop skit.

“Oh my satan you have to buy that outfit” The salesperson said.

“Yeah it looks totlly hot.” said B’Ubbles Slaughter.

“You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really hot in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?” he asked.

“Yeah I am actually.” I looked back at him. “Hey BTW my name’s cnandy vaud’ville prosopagnosia NIKOLA grimaldi what’s yours?”

“Jula Herbert.” He said and ran a hand through his black-dyed hair. “maybe I’ll see you there tonight.”

“Yeah I don’t think so cause I am going there with my bf Tim you sick perv!” I yelled angrily, but before he could beg me to go with him, Evan flew in on his lonely mist looking worried. “OMFG CNANDY U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE INSTITUTE NOW!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> julia can be a he/him lesbian if i want him to be, it's my fic


	17. 17

Chapter 17.

AN: I sed stup flming da stryo! if ur a prep den dnot red it! u kin tel weder ur a huntr or not by ma quiz itz on ma tumglr. if ur not den u rok. if u r den FOOOOOK UFFFFFFFFFF! pz sguar isn’t rely a huntr. Sarah plz do dis il promis 2 giv u bak ur postr!

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Julia Herbert gave us some clothes n stuff 4 free. He said he wud help us wif makeup if he wunted koz he was relly in2 fashin n stuff. (hes lezbean). Ean kept shooting at us to cum back 2 Magnus. “WTF Evan?” I shouted angrily. “Fuck off you fjucking bastard.” Well anyway Sugar came. Eavn went away angrily.

“Hey bitch you look kawaii.” she said.

“Yah but not as kawaii as you.” I answered sadly cause Sarah’s really pretty and everything. She was wearing a short pink corset-thingy with blood red lace on it and a yellow blood-red miniskirt, leather fish-nets and black poiny boots that showed off how pale she wuz. She had a really nice body wif big bobs and everything. She was shot enouff 2 be vast.

“So r u going 2 da concert wif Tim?” she asked.

“Yah.” I said happily.

“I’m gong with Pancake.” she anserred happily. Well anyway Tim and Pancake came. They were both loking extremely hot and sexy and u could tell they thoufht we were ot 2. Pancake was wearing a yellow vest. He was wearing tons off makeup jus like PT Barnum. Tim was wearing red leather pants, a clowncore red CdS t-shirt and shiny space boots he got from Claire's. B’ubbles Slaughr was going 2 da concert wif Distorshun. Distorshun used to be called Michel but it tuned out dat he was kidnapped at birth and his real family were Gertrud robson. She dyed in a gun. Michal converted to communism and he went goth. He was Stranger now. He was wearing a pink t-shirt, yellow jeans and shoes and blonde hair wif rainbow streekz in it. We kall him Distoton now. Well anyway we al went 2 Tim's red Clonncra (geddit cuz wer clonncre) that his bother Dnany gave him. We did pot, coke and crak. Tim and I made out. We made fun of dose stupid fuking Huntrs. We soon got there…….I gapsed.

The acrabat was da sexiest guy eva! He locked even sexier den he did in pix. He had long raven blak hair n piercing blue eyes. He wuz really skinny and he had n amazing voice. Sudenly tha acroba polled of his mask. So did the other membez. I gasped. It wasn’t the acrbat at all! It was an ugly bourgeoisie man wif no nose and green eyes... Every1 ran away but me and Tim. Tim and I came. It was…….Eliss and da wutchrs!

“U moronic idiots!” he shooted angstily. “Cnady, I told u to kill Archivist. Thou have failed. And now……….I shall kill thou and Tim!”

“No no please!” We begged sadly but he took out his knife.

Sudenly a clonncore old man apped in hiz mst. He had lung red hair and a looong pink bread. He wus werring a pink vest dat sed ‘avril lavigne’ on da back. He shotted and Elasssi ran away. It was………………………………… Plukass!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had to remove an ed mention from this. you're welcome. anyways, communist nikola rights!


	18. 18

Chapter 18.

AN: I SED STUP FLAMMING! if u do den ur a fuken huntr! trapez 2 raven 4 da help n stuf. u rok! n ur nut a huntr. trapez for muh sewter! ps da oder eson plukas swor is koz he trin 2 be clonncore so der!

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I woke up the next day in my ten. I walked out of it and put on some red eyeliner, blue eyesharrow, blood-pink lipstick and a pink really low-cut leather dress that was all frilly and in dots so you could see my belly. I was wearing a my little pony belly ring with blue and red diamonds inside it.

(Da night before Tim and I rent back to the stage (geddit skull koz im clonncore n I like applase). Dumbeldore chased Vlodemort away. We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Britney Spears song.)

Well anyway I went down to the Archives. There all da walls were painted pink and da tables were pink too. But you fould see that there was black pant underneath the pnk pant. And there were pastors of goff bands everywhere, like My Chemical Romance and Linkin Park.

“WTF!” I shouted going to sit next to B’ubbles Slaughter and Sarah. B’ubbles Slaughter was wearing a red leather mini with a Cirkdarukv du Solol t-shirt, yellow fishnets and black pointy boots. Willow was wearing a puffy clonncore yellow dress with blood red writing that was all sequiny and came up to your thighs and black boots and fishnets. Archivist, Distortion and Tim came. We started to talk about who was sexier, Britney or Avril or Katy Perry. The boys joined in cause they were bi.

“Those girls are so fucking hot.” Michal was saying as suddenly a clonncore old man with a pink beard and everything came. He was the same one who had chassed away Eliasss yesterday. He had normal pale skin but he was wearing white foundation and he had died his hare red.

“……………….PLUKAS?1!” we all gasped.

“WTF?” I shouted angrily. “I thought he was just wearing that to scare Elais!”

“Hello everyone.” he said happily. “As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?”

Everyone from the poser table in Behlding started to cheer. Well we stranger just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads. We couldn’t believe what a poser he was!1.

“BTW you can call me Petyr.” HE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.

“What a fucking poser!” Tim shouted angrily as we we to Anatomy. We were holding hands. Archivist looked really jealous. I could see him crying blood in a clowncore keay (geddit, keay lik Gerard n Mray) but I didn’t say anything. “I bet he’s havin a mid-life crisis!” Sugar shouted.

I was so fucking angry.


	19. 19

Chapter 19. im nut ok i promise

AN: plz stup flaming da story if u do ur a foken huntr n ur jelous ok!11 frum noq un im gong 2 delt ur men reviowz!111 BTW evonyd a stanger so der!1 trapez 2 sarah 4m da help!11

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All day we sat angerly finking about Plukas. We were so fucking pissed off. Well, I had one thing to look forward too- da CdS performance. It had been postphoned, so we could all go.

Anyway, I went to the common room sadly to cut classes. Tim was being all secretive.

I asked what it was and he got all mad me and started crying all hot and angsty (rnt sensitve bi guyz so hot).

“No one fucking understands me!1” he shouted angrily as his black hare went in his small black eyes. He was wearing pink skirk, a red vest and a blue polkadot die. (geddit insted of tie koz im a monstr) I was wearing a pink leather top with glier all over it all over it a bluee leather mini, black high held boots. My hair was al donn in a relly shrt bob like Amela Burler. (email me if u wana see da pik)

“Accuse me? What about me!” I growled.

“Buy-but-but-” he grunted.

“You fucking bastard!” I moaned.

“No! Wait! It’s not what it fucking looks like!” he shouted.

But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. Tim banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my blody eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my feces like Blood whe u skin som1 (arah that is soo our thing!). I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot.

Suddenly Evan came. He had came fro moist.

“You gave me a fucking shock!” I shouted angrily dropping my pot. “Wtf do you fink you’re doing in da gurl’s room?”

Only it wasn’t just Evan. Someone else was with him too! For a second I wanted it 2 b Juli Herber or maybe Tim but it was Plukas.

“Hey I need to ask you a question.” he said, pulling out his pink wanabe-clonncore purse. “What are u wearing to the performance?”

“U no who CdS r!” I gasped.

“No I just saw there was a performan dat a lot of clonnz and scenez were going 2.” He said. “Anyway Tim has a surprise for u.”


	20. 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tws for pedophilia mentions, rape mentions and uhhhh *checks notes* something i hesitate to call sexual content

Chapter 20.

AN: I sed I dnoty ker wut u fink! stof pflamin ok huntrz!1 trapez 2 sara 4 da help!1 oh yah btw ill be un vacation in russi 4 da nex 3 dayz so dnot expect updatz.

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All day I wondered what the surprise was. Meanwhile, I pot on a pik ledder mini, a blue corset with urple seqin stuff all over it, an ble clonncore compact boots. CdS were gong 2 do the perform again, since Elais had taken over the last one. I skinnds som1 while I dancd 2 CdS in my bedroom all night, feeling excited. Suddenly someone knocked on the door while I was trying on sum sparkly clothes and dancin to coton eye joe. I gut all mad and turned it of, but sacredly I hopped inside dat it was Tim so we could do it again.

“Wut de fucking hell r u doing!” I shouted angrily. It was Nolan! “R u gonna cum rape me or what.” I yelled. I was allowed to say dat because Plukas had told us all 2 be careful around hem and Farchild since he was a pedo.

“No, actshelly (geddit, hell) kan I plz burrow sum condemns.” he growld angrily.

“Yah, so u can fuk ur six-yr-old gurlfriend, huh?” I shouted sarkastikally.

“Fuker.” He said, gong away.

Well anyway, I put on some pink eyesharow, red eyeliner, and some blue lipstick and white foundation. Then I went. Den I gasped…………………………………………………………….Farchild and Noan were in da middle of da empty hall, doin it, and john amherst was watching!1

“Oh my god you ludacris idiot!” they both shooted angrily when they saw me. john amherst ran away crying. Dey got up, though. Normally I wood have ben turned on (I luv cing guyz do it) but both of them were fuking desolationz. (btw farchild is movd 2 litlezz flam now)

“WTF is that why u wanted condoms?” I asked sadistically. (c I speld dat)

“Only you wouldn’t give them to me!” Nolan shouted angrily.

“Well you shoulda told me.” I replayed.

“You dimwit!.” Farchild began 2 shoot angrily. And then………I took out my hello kitty camera and took a pic of them. U could see that they were naked and everything.

“Well xcuse me!” they both shouted angrily. “What was dat al about?”

“It wuz to blackmail u.” I snarked. “So now next time you see me doing it with my boyfriend you cant fuking rat me out or I’ll show dis to Plukas. So fuck off, u bastards!” I started to run. They chased me but I threw my lotin at them and dey tripped over it. Well anyway, I went outside and there was Archivist, looking extremely fucking hot.

“WTF where’d Tim?” I asked him.

“Oh he’s bein a fucking bastard. He told me he wouldn’t cum.” Archivist said shaking his hed. “U wanna cum with me? 2 the concert?”

Then….. he showed me his clown car. I gasped. It was a pink car. He said his granmoth had given it 2 him. The license plate on the front sed CLOWNS on it. The one on da back said ‘CNADY’ on it.

……….I gasped.

We flew to the concert hall. CdS were there, playing.

Vampire and I began 2 make out, moshing to the muzik. I gapsed, looking at da band.

I almost had an orgasim. The acrobat was so fucking hot! She begin 2 sing and her sexah beautiful voice began 2 fill the hall. ……….And den, I heard some crrying. I turned and saw Tim, cryin in a corner.


	21. 21

Chapter 21.

AN: fuk u ok! u fokng suk. itz nut ma fult if itz speld rong ok koz dat bich sara cuz it fok u huntrz!1 woopz soz sarah trapez 4 da help. btw rusia rox hrad!1 I even gut 2 go 2 da kasel wer tsar wuz kill!

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Later we all went in the skull. Tim was crying in da common room. “Tim are u okay?” I asked in a clowncore voice.

“No I’m not u fuking bitch!” he shouted angrily. He stated to run out of the place. I stated to cry cuz I was afraid he would set off th detonator.

“Its ok Cnady.” said Archivist comfortly. “Ill make him feel better.”

“U mean you’ll go fuck him wont you!” I shouted angrily. Then I ran 2 get Tim. Archivis came too.

“Tim please come!” he began to cry. Tears of blood came down his brown face. I wuz so turned on cuz I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of!)

And then………………………….. we herd sum footsteps! Archivist got out his tap recordr. We both hid behin it. We saw the janitor Worms there, shouting angrily with a flashlight in her hand.

“WHOSE THERE!” she shouted angrily. We saw Jane Prentiss come. they went by the tap recordr and started to squish loudly.

“IS ANY1 THERE!” yelled Worms.

“No fuck u you huntr little sun of a fukcing bich!” Archivist said under his breast in a disgusted way.

“EXCUS ME! EXCUS ME WHO SED DAT!” yelled Worms. Den she heard Jane squish. “Jane is der any1 behin da record!” he asked. Jane nodded. And then……………………….Archis frenched me! He did it jus as…………………….. Worms was taking da recordr!1

“WHAT DA-” she yelled but it was 2 late cuz now we were ruining away frum her. And den we saw Tim crying n bustin in2 tearz and seting off th detonator outside of da insitiue.

“Tim!” I cried. “R u okay?”

“I guess though.” Tim weeped. We went back to our tents frenching each other. Tim and I decided to watch the Houze o Wax (c isnt da deprezzin) on the clonncore pink bed together. As I wuz about 2 put in the video, my eyes rolled up and suddenly I had a vision of something that was happening now. There was a knok on the door and Jord and da ECDC walked into the institties!1


	22. 22

Chapter 22.

AN: stfu! prepz stup flaming ok if u dnot lik it fuk of I no itz flesh worms itz sarah's folt ok!11 u suk!1 no jus kidding sara u fokieng rok huntrz suk!1

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All day everyone talked about the ECDC. Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my coffin so I opened the door. I was wearing pink lacey leather pajamas. Then I gasped.

Standing in front of me where………………. B;ubbles Slaughter, Archivist, Pancake, Tim, Distortion and Sugar!

I opened my blue eyes. Sugar was wearing a tight pink leather top with pictures of bloody roses all over it. Under that she wart a yellow poofy skirt wit lace on it and orange clowncore boots that was attached to the top. Archivist was wearing a blue t-shirt and a frilly rainbow skort. Tim was wearing a green vest and blak jeans and a tailcoat. He looked just likee PT Barnum, and almost as fucking sexy. B’ubbles Slaughter was wearing a tight black poofy clonncore dress that she had added frills to so it showed of all her clearage with a white apron that said ‘bich’ and other swear words and Britney lyrics on it kind of like one dress I had seen once. Sparkles (who is Tasha) was there too. She was weaving a frilly clowncore red dress with ftilly stuff all over it and a lace-up top thing and black pointy boots. So were Naiomi and Tessa. It turns out that Sparkles, Pancake, Lydia and Tessa's dad was a lonely. He left. They all got so depressed that they became clonncore and converted to commuism.

“OMFG” I yielded as I jumped up. “Why the fuck are u all here?”

“Cnady something is really fucked up.” Tim said.

“OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first.” I shouted angrily.

“It’s all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so fucking beautiful.” Tim said in a sexy voice.

“Oh all right.” I said smiling. “But you have to tell me why your being all erective.”

“I will I will.” he said.

So I just put on some blue eyeliner, yellow lipstick and red eyeshadow and white foundation. Then I came. We all went outside the archives and looked in from a widow. A fucking goth called Gerard from behlding was standing next to us. He was wearing black ripped jeans and a My Chemical Romance t-shirt so we put up our middle fingers at him. Inside the Great Hall we could see Plukas. Jordnan Kendy was there shouting at Plukas. Nikole Backstreetboys was there too.

“THIS CANNOT BE!” she shouted angrily. “THE SCHOOL MUST BE CLOSED!”

“THE ELISA IS PLANNING TO KILL THE AVATARS!” yelled Jordna Kendy.

“YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE THE HEAD OF THE INSTITUTE ANY LONGER!” yelled Nicole backstreetboys. “YOU ARE TOO OLD AND YOUR ALZHEIMERS IS DANGEROUS! YOU MUST RETRY OR ELIAS WILL KILL YOUR AVATARS!”

“Very well.” Plukas said angrily. “Butt we cannot do this. We can’t close the institute. There is only one person who is capable of killing Elias and she is in the school. And her name is…………………………………………………………………..Candy Vaud’ville Prosopagnosia Sarah Grimaldi.”

Tim, Tessa, Naiomi, Sparkles, Sugar, Archivist and B’ubbles Slaughter looked at each other………I gasped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh thank fuck i'm halfway through, i'm so sorry to all the minor statement giver characters i dragged into this, i still have 22 chapters left though,,,, hhh,,,,


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